A Place in Time

A year ago I was in such a different place. I was depressed, hated myself (literally hated myself), and thought starving myself would solve my problems. Society tells women that if they lose those extra 10 pounds, then life will be peachy. It didn't take me long to realize that this was not the case. Not eating made me more unhappy and the thing is, I may have dropped a few pounds, but as soon as I started eating normally, those few pounds came right back.

It was at the end of the semester a year ago when I realized just how deep my hurt and depression was. For 4 1/2 months I sought the affirmation of others, dealt with my depression by eating-thus the extra weight, and turned around and decided that cutting my calories in half was the best answer. Go figure- all it did was bring me back to square one. I decided I needed to do something about everything- be proactive, get help. So I did, and God's mercy is so sweet. His love is so deep and His redemption was the very grace my life was craving a second taste of.

A year later I am in a much better place. I've lost over a pants size, simply by living a healthy life. I've learned to appreciate all the friends that I do have and just like my relationship with the Lord, this means trust. I may mess up or do stupid things, but at the end of the day I rest my head knowing that the Lord still loves me and calls me His child and my friends still love me- quirks and all. I've learned to appreciate who God created me to be-HIs daughter, a woman with deep passions, dreams, emotions, intelligence, beauty, and tons of personality! I don't say these things with vanity, but rather to state that I know who I am.I appreciate what I have to offer. I love how God has created me.That's a huge step from where I was last May.

And last of all, God has blessed me with David. He came out of nowhere and moved into my heart.He is an example of God's grace in my life. David came after God filled my deepest need-to know who I am, to be sure of my identity. And that I am-I am nothing apart from Jesus Christ. So now, David and I can run towards that cross together!!