Danger of Silence

So I have had the past two days to immerse myself in silence. Both of my roommates are currently away for Easter, so I have been left alone in our quiet, empty house. Yesterday I rather enjoyed the silence. Today the hours dragged on, although at the same time it's hard to believe I've been up for over 12 hours. It's amazing the things you are faced with in the silence.

I have to admit that I've never been a fan of silence.I'm normally the one who feels the need to somehow fill the silences- whether it be a corny joke, nervous laughter, or some random question. There are very few people in my life that I'm ok being silent with. In fact, when things have been silent in group gatherings and I haven't broken that silence, people have asked me if there's anything wrong. These scenarios say 2 things- one, I'm afraid of silence. And two, so are other people. Our world is so noisy, with tv, stereos, iPods, video games, and the need to fill uneasy silent spots in the conversation. Why are we so afraid to be still and to be quiet? Life gets so crazy and if we never slow down, we are causing ourselves and maybe even others more harm than good.

These past two days have been almost out of character for me. Normally I always turn on my stereo for background noise. I love music- sometimes I pick out the songs that would be on my own personal soundtrack. But this weekend, I turned my stereo off and slowed things down. There's a lot that I need to process through, as always. I think we get afraid of silence because God often speaks to us in the silence and sometimes we just don't want to hear what he says. He showed me some things in my own heart today that I wish weren't there. No wonder silence is a spiritual discipline..

Last year was my first Easter away from home. It was tough, but Jan and I had an awesome Easter! After church, we spent the afternoon cooking and ate Easter dinner with a bunch of our friends in the Wilmore mini park. It was so much fun! This year I again will not be home for Easter, obviously. And it certainly mde it harder to say goodbye to my parents on wednesday, knowing that just 4 days later, I would be by myself on Easter. But God is so faithful and tommorow is not a day to wish for something more when God has already given me "more!" So rejoice, for Christ is ALIVE!!!

In His Mercy...