Redemption

I was thinking Wednesday night, as I was trying to calm myself down from the excitement of the day, that getting engaged was in a way a redemption. In the moment that David said, "Will you marry me?" and I said yes, God brought full redemption to the brokenness that I once had. I really struggled with being single. I wanted nothing more than to get married and have a family of my own. It was a desire that was so deep in my heart and I got to a point where I was tired of people saying to me, "God wouldn't give you these desires if He wasn't going to provide for you." Well, how was I supposed to know whether these desires were from the Lord or my own selfish desires? I can't tell you how many times I cried out to God, praying to be ok with being single. I finally got to a point where I had a deeper understanding of being satisfied in the Lord alone and that is exactly when the Lord gave me David. And 7 1/2 months later, David got down on his knee and proposed. That was the moment when I realized that God had redeemed a heart that had been broken. He redeemed the despair I felt for so long.

I have so much to be thankful for this holiday season. A wonderful fiance. Friends who love me and want what's best for me. A church family to share in my joy. Ministry involvement that crazy enough, is a nice study break for me- no matter how loud and crazy those kids get! I have a family that loves me and supports me unconditionally and has raised me well. My parents have shown me in their own relationship what a marriage is supposed to be. And most importantly, I have a deep joy in my heart that wouldn't be possible if it weren't for the living Jesus Christ.

In the words of Edwin McCain, cheesy but so true:

These are the moments I thank God that I'm alive
These are the moments I'll remember all my life
I've got all I've waited for
And I could not ask for more

In His Mercy.